2017 marks my 10th year in Singapore.
My first Christmas here was in 2007, with no family and just a handful of newfound friends. It was the loneliest Christmas ever, being away from family on the most special occasion of the year. But it was the most unforgettable – as being away meant I needed to suck up the holidays and still make the most out of it, in spite of $0 balance in my bank account.
I was supposed to receive my first salary before that Christmas, but due to some “bank error” I had nothing, but just some money lent by our HR so I could pay my rent and buy my food until after the holidays. Whenever people think that working abroad is ‘easy money’ they obviously have not done it before. There were many moments of staring into space, eating the cheapest food I could find (thank God for Old Chang Kee and $2 hawker food), and scouring the store selling export overruns for clothes worth $3-5 just to have something new for Christmas. I remember having a complete new outfit including a new pair of shoes for under $30.
Short of cash and self-esteem, I still vowed to make Christmas in Singapore special by visiting shopping malls with a big Christmas tree. My friends joined me in my quest – we went to Jurong Point and AMK Hub, and perhaps another mall that I could not remember. Jurong East then had no JEM, J-Cube or West Gate. Orchard Road had no ION, 313 Somerset, Orchard Central or Orchard Gateway. Plaza Singapura was newly built. Christmas was not as commercialized as now, where some store promotions even beat those of the Great Singapore Sale in June.
I swore then that I would never spend Christmas again in Singapore. It was too lonely without family and the festivities. I missed simbang gabi (midnight mass), the bazaars and reunion with family and friends. I missed shopping and dining to my heart’s content.
Now 10 years down the road, I am going to spend my 6th Christmas in Singapore, with the past 3 years choosing not to go home for practical reasons. Spending all these years in a foreign country, where I first came on my own in my 20s, then later got married and now have my own family, has changed my perspective about where “home” is. Is it the place where my husband and I grew up in, shared common childhood memories or the place where we choose to live and spend our days? When I ask my 3 year old son where he lives, he will say ‘Singapore’ but just the other day, when I asked him what he wants for Christmas, he said, “Philippine (plane) tickets!” I am guessing that he is as ‘torn’ as we are, although he only barely spent a month in the Philippines with his cousins, uncles, aunties, grandparents, grand uncles and grand aunties in his entire lifetime.
Christmas in Singapore will not be as special as in the Philippines because of two things: First, Traditions – going outdoors to enjoy the cool weather, seeing Christmas decors and lights in every neighborhood, singing of Christmas carols by kids and sometimes adults outside our house every single night of December until Christmas day, waking up at 3am each day for 9 days to attend Mass and eat pan de sal and hot cocoa in the morning, attending Christmas parties for every group of people we know. Second is Family – most people would reserve their vacation leaves for this time of the year to enjoy the holiday food, outings and reunions with family and close friends.
However, Christmas in Singapore, while somewhat superficial, has evolved so much in the past years. Along with its continuous advancement, the country has also become more ‘globalized’ with events such as Halloween, Black Friday and Christmas getting more popular each year. I believe this is a way for Singapore to make itself a place that is truly home away from home for many non-locals. It is no longer the once so-lonely place where no foreigner or tourist wants to be in during these holidays. It is now a place to go for families overseas to visit their loved ones living here, with traveling made easier and convenient these recent years.
Simbang gabi or ‘misa de gallo‘ is being celebrated from 15th to 24th December at 1-2 Churches around Singapore. Lee and I completed the 9 days during his first Christmas here in 2010. The “sacrifice” is different compared to the Philippines as we had to navigate to never-visited-before Churches and deal with huge crowds of people each night. Most, if not all Churches here are air-conditioned, but I still miss the early morning cool weather that made getting up to shower and get dressed for the service a lot more challenging.
One of my own traditions carried on from then until now is to visit Orchard Road for its Christmas lights and decors. I don’t think I’ve ever missed a Christmas without coming there to take pictures or to simply stroll along and marvel at the illuminated shopping street. It was not long after when other Christmas installations started, such as those in Gardens by the Bay – Flower Dome and Christmas Wonderland. I suppose every shopping mall would have a Christmas theme now. It is becoming less of a “Christian” event but more of an international community celebration.
Regardless of whether people understand the reason behind celebrating Christmas, it is great to see more people remembering the occasion for what it is now. I had a former colleague who gets excited with the thought of Christmas because she can set up her big plastic tree and shop for gifts for her kids. It has become an occasion to celebrate and appreciate each other, regardless of religion. And I believe this places more meaning to Christmas, and one of the good reasons to stay in Singapore, aside from being able to save a few thousand bucks for the plane tickets and avoid the dreaded traffic jam in Manila.
2012 – 2017
In 2012, little did we know that it would be our last Christmas as a couple-only family, with the usual shopping for gifts, attending Advent Sunday masses and Christmas parties ’til late changing remarkably in the following years.
Christmas wishes do come true – sometimes packaged not according to our specifications but God’s own design. Our greatest wish was granted in 2013 – I finally conceived with “minimum intervention”! I was super pregnant that Christmas and felt like our baby was coming anytime between Christmas and New Year. This was the year I first discovered the joy of online shopping, because it’s still way more inexpensive than shopping for baby stuff than any place in Singapore. Some Christmas gift shopping happened online too, with my limited physical ability to raid the malls to scout for gifts.
Our first Christmas as a family of 3 was spent both in Singapore and the Philippines. We traveled in the morning of Christmas Day. The following years would be spent in Singapore with our parents going here to celebrate the holidays.
2017 – another Christmas to be spent in the island-state of Singapore. December was met with a seemingly endless quest for Christmas gifts even with a relatively short list since we are not going back home. Many good things happened in the past year (life-changing stuff!) and I feel energized in spite of work and Christmas preparations happening simultaneously. Looking back to 10 years that have passed gives me a sense of fulfillment, knowing that all the ups and downs were all there for a good reason (depending on how we see it!). I am utterly grateful for how it all turned out.
Life is about learning, working for and reaching goals, and continuously growing to become a better person for others. The past years have taught me more not to judge other people’s decisions and choices, because what do I know? A simple example – I used to wonder why some Filipino families choose to be away from home for many Christmases, and now we are one of them. I will surely miss the comforts of my first home these coming holidays, but with family members traveling abroad, we would probably not miss as much, and we can still spend quality time with family here without having to worry about the holiday rush. It’s all about perspective. Like everything else is.
🌸 Everything has changed and yet, I’m more me than I’ve ever been 🌸
Iain Thomas🌻
Live Happy 